The Week In Ugly: Week of May 15 - May 21, 2011

The gods of ugly have blessed us with a bountiful harvest of ugly this week; much of which has been sewn, and subsequently reaped, at the 2011 Cannes Film Festival, both on and off the red carpet. Those Frenchies sure have a sneaky way of spreading their ugly. 

Faye Dunaway

Looks like Faye has "Dunaway" with any sense of good taste.

Charlotte Gainsbourg

What is up with pregnant women falsely believing that people want to see their repulsive bellies?
Just because you chose to get knocked up, doesn't mean we want to see your massive middle! Put. It. Away.

*Charlotte Gainsbourg is an English-born, Paris-raised actress (what an ugly err, umm, lovely combo), who has been in a few American films, of which, no one has ever heard. She is also a singer-songwriter of songs we have never heard.

Khloe Kardashian

Fix yo-self, girrrrl, you got a camel toe!

I had a serious inner debate with myself about whether or not I should include this picture, because I LOVE me some Khloe Kardashian. This debate, however, only lasted about 5 seconds, because that is some serious camel toe.

I still love you, Khloe, we all commit crimes of fashion, and you're the only Kardashian sister who isn't totally lame and boring. xoxo, D.

Demi Lovato

Shield your eyes, more CAMEL TOE!

In Demi's defense, this picture is from the car accident she was in this week, so perhaps she hadn't planned on getting out of her car. But then again, if you weren't planning to get out of your car at all, why would you be driving in the first place?

Aubrey O'Day

If you find this attractive, God bless you. All I see are a big ol' pair of clown boobs.
And a rather clownin' face, to match.

Lily Allen

Ugly Lily was partying it up in London for her bachelorette party.
Judging from her dreary outfit, this was actually a combination bachelorette party/funeral.

Ugins

ug-ins [ugg-inz]
-noun
1. ugly twins
2. either of two persons or things closely resembling each other, in a manner that is very unattractive, unpleasant to look at, or displeasing in appearance.
See also: uglets

This week, the gods of ugly have blessed us with an "Ugly Twins" double whammy!

Big Bird & Naomi Campbell

"H" is for "Horrific," "Horrendous," "Hideous," and
"Hoo, chil'! How in the Hell, you gon' steal my style? You messed wit da wrong bird, Hoe! I'mma cutchu!"

'Where's Waldo?' & Mischa Barton

I'm about to give up on the hope that we'll ever see Taylor Momsen again. We have no one to blame but ourselves for this. If only someone would buy her lame ass album(s?), or buy a ticket to see her perform with her "band". But alas, none of us wants to waste even a dime to see her ugly ass do anything, for she is much too terrible at everything, except being exceptionally ugly.

Whatever. See you next week, my ugly little children!

*I have been using larger pictures, in order to better show every ugly detail. So, if it's taking a while to load the entire post, please be patient, I promise it's worth every bit of ugly. Either be patient, or purchase a better computer

As always, click on the pictures to see even more ugly detail!

Aubrey O'Day: Now It's Just Getting Sad

Tonight marks the premiere of Aubrey O'Day's new show, All About Aubrey, on America's classiest network: Oxygen.

This show follows Aubrey and her fake boobies around, as she desperately tries to convince us that she's not just a useless piece of garbage that missed her true calling as a porn star.

Rough night, Aubrey?

Oxygen's website states that "at 26 years old and a little more worldly, it's time for O'Day to tackle the tough questions," and then proceeds to ask 3 extremely difficult questions.  You could watch the show to find out the answers... or you can take the less painful route, and skip all of that, because I have the answers right here!  You can thank me later. 

Question 1: Will she find Mr. Right?
Answer: Do filthy hookers even care about finding "Mr. Right"?

Question 2: Can she prove to the industry that she has the star power to get back on top?
Answer: She was never exactly "on top," so how could she return to a place she's never been?

Question 3: Can she put in the hard work to deal with the cameras, the gossip, and the backstabbing?
Answer: Does she really think that any amount of hard work will actually make a difference?

My deepest apologies, I know it's rude to answer a question with a question, but I just couldn't help myself.  

If you have some sort of freakish desire to see what is sure to be an incredibly lame show, All About Aubrey premieres tonight at 10/9c.