Kanye West Thinks He's Hitler ... and Michael Jordan

Kanye West went on another one of his characteristic rants in the middle of a performance in England, Saturday night.

In this especially strange and entertaining rant, he compared himself to Adolf Hitler and Michael Jordan.

Comparing himself to Hitler, Kanye said:

"I walk down the street, and people look at me like I'm f##king insane. Like I'm Hitler."

But wait, let Kanye finish. He continued his rant, suggesting he was the Michael Jordan of music:

"Michael Jordan changed so much in basketball, he took his power to make a difference. It's so much f##king going on in music right now, and somebody has to make a f##king difference."

Watch TMZ's video, in which Kanye West compares himself to Hitler. <sup>[1]


[1]</sup> TMZ Staff "Kanye: People Look At Me Like I'm Adolf Hitler" TMZ 8 August 2011.

The Salahis: Looking for a Womb to Crash

Not-currently-pregnant women everywhere, be on high alert:

Tareq and Michaele Salahi are on the prowl for an empty womb, in which to crash grow a baby ... and we all know that this couple is predisposed to showing up uninvited in even the most highly secured areas (allegedly).
 

Michaele: a dangerously insane human being.
Photo Credit: Official White House Photo by Samantha Appleton

That's right, even the Secret Service may not be able to keep the Salahis out of your womb... allegedly.

TMZ broke the story, and spoke with Michaele, who explained that she & Tareq have chosen to have their baby via surrogate, because of Michaele's alleged multiple sclerosis, and her very real old age (she's 45). *

Michaele also told TMZ:

"I'm overjoyed with the hope of starting a family and the blessing of love and peace a child will bring to our lives."

A child bringing peace to the lives of their parents? Interesting theory.

Wahh! I want a baby!

If you haven't seen Michaele Salahi's version of singing and dancing, you should really watch this:

* Babies born to women who are "over-the-hill," are almost guaranteed to have all kinds of crap wrong with them. ^[2]

Here's a picture of Josie Duggar, born 5 months prematurely, to a 43-year-old Michelle Duggar:

Josie Brooklyn Duggar (AP Photo/TLC, Scott Enlow)

^[1] TMZ Staff "The Salahis -- We're Gonna Have a Baby!!!" TMZ 6 August 2011.

^[2] Gunter, Jennifer "Despite risks, Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar are open to the idea of more children" Examiner 12 February 2010.

I'm Naming Names: A Rant.

And the name is : TAYLOR SWIFT.

I'm sorry, I just have to get this off my chest: Sometimes I feel that I am the only one in the world who hates Taylor Swift.  But then I remember that I am not alone in this fight.  I, along with many weary souls, have grown so tired of that curly-haired, beady-eyed, awkward girl.

What's there to like about her?  Nothing.

Kisses! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Her performances are both awkward and terrible. She can't hit a single note to save her life, and she makes me want to end mine.

She's still harping on the fact that she "names names," but I have news for you, T-Sweezy: NO ONE CARES.  It wasn't unique when you started, and now it's just old and tired.

Why must you continue to beat that dead horse, year after terrible year?  HAVE YOU NO SOUL?

Shame on you, Taylor, shame, shame, shame on you!  You have shamed me greatly, and if your family were Asian, they would also be terribly ashamed.

Dear Taylor: even just thinking about you has ruined Sally Jessy Raphael's birthday almost entirely for me. But I will NOT let you take this special, special day from me!